On-Line at The Short Line Simulblast Edition for Saturday, June 22, 2013

On-Line at the Short Line






On-Line at the Short Line

June 22, 2013

In This Issue…

  • SpaMar 2013: Robo-Handicapping
  • SpaMar 2013: Humans, Not Robots, Control the Horseys
  • SpaMar 2013: Half-Off!
  • SpaMar 2013: For the Bashful, the Unimpressed, the Stubborn, the Proud & Those Who Are Otherwise Too Good to Join Us

SpaMar 2013: Robo-Handicapping

For a change, an early promotion…

All right, all right, ya Del Mar lovers! All right, all right, ya Saratoga lovers! Here’s what’s going on. We have been quiet yet we persist, not unlike a low-grade infection…

Still top of the top is the All-In-One V6. Yea, verily, customers call from all parts of the North American continent and share their excitement. Beaten-down old-timers who’ve lived through it all have a newfound lilt in their voice. True, many of them no longer enjoy the pleasure of an alcoholic beverage or a real tobacco-burning cigarette, but they have replaced those temporary (and quite often deleterious) thrills for the longer-lasting (and much more edifying) satisfaction of being able to play the races with more confidence and — yea, verily— more fun than ever before. Rookies and virgins also should benefit mightily from using the V6 from the get-go; no need to go down other blind alleys for years and years.

OK. Here’s a real-life quote to tide you over: “I am just tickled with this All-In-One V6. I [mess] my pants every morning looking forward to what it tells me”.

OK, then. A little graphic, that, perhaps, but for the most part it’s accurate and not an uncommon sort of feeling when it comes to using the All-In-One V6. Continent-wide Cynthia Publishing Company par times are built-in, and with the recommended HDW (Handicappers Data Warehouse) download option, the promise of 21st-century robo-handicapping comes to life, and that is not something to take lightly. That’s because we know you’re busy. We know you have to post on Internet message boards 55,000 times a year, plus update your Twitbook and Facester feeds every 30 seconds. Additionally, it’s summertime, and you have better things to do, like relax and take it easy. This is not the time or place to be weighed down with a Rube Goldberg-type handicapping contraption that calls for hours and hours of your attention. Five, 10 mins. per day, tops, during July and August and probably beyond. This is the promise of the All-In-One V6 right now, today. Download, AutoCompute, done. Suck in the results in the evening, and the software keeps getting better. Scan the output for all the cards you can stand, and the proper decisions (long-term, anyway) quite often just leap off the screen or page. It’s not a bad way to live. It’s almost certainly better than what the blabbermouth sitting next to you or screaming on the Internet message boards is doing. Don’t let the blowhards dissuade you!

Truly, we prefer to be a miracle, a little bit savant, a small section of black-box magic in a handicapping world full of meaningless sound and fury. While the rest of the self-important handicappers raise their voices, throw up their hands in gesticulation and pontificate and bloviate, we keep our own counsel. We prefer to save that sort of precision and drudgery and Ph.D.-level discourse for the important things, such as brain surgery, rocket science and Wall Street bonuses. As soon as Oxford and Cambridge and Harvard or even Tulane start offering postgraduate training in the art and science of handicapping, then we shall be forced to rethink our lax style. Until such time, it’s OK to be a miracle, a little bit savant, etc. If you prefer the hard sell, a loud voice proclaiming to be an expert who will improve your knowledge of handicapping to five decimal places, by all means, go over there and enjoy. If you are a micromanager or need constant hand-holding, reassurance and wet-nursing, by all means, find what you need, just not from us. We are not smart enough or skilled enough to take care of you. Regrets!

So, for us and for a few other select, levelheaded, mainly mature men and women, All-In-One V6 is that nice, steady bit of software that allows us to achieve top-level mutuel results without having to resort to becoming insufferable know-it-alls. We have the opportunity to be good handicappers and bettors while retaining our humanity. For us, anyway, it’s a worthy tradeoff. Again, as long as you are not preternaturally dramatic or in need of constant attention, do feel free to join us. We are not know-it-alls, nor do we have time to listen to same. Thank you.

Ordering options:

Top package

Software only

Amnesty (Update after years and years of dormancy — come back or not)

Update V6 to 2013 pars

(Hefty disclaimer: Mac-OS X users welcome, but not beyond X.6.8; for now, beyond X.6.8 requires Windozen/PC emulator; sorry. Windozen users — even Windoze Ocho — always welcome.

SpaMar 2013: Half-Off!

Paying retail is for…for somebody else! Email us to take our survey and we’ll send instructions to save half off the 2013 Winning Trainer Tricks for Swampatoga & Del Mar.

SpaMar 2013: Humans, Not Robots, Control the Horseys

All right, all right. Back by lukewarm, semi-popular demand, your 2013 Winning Trainer Tricks for Swampatoga and Del Mar, this year. Same price. We charge what we charge, but we don’t necessarily want to gouge. If you find it worthwhile or of some value to yourself, you sign up. Otherwise, you move along. No hard feelings.

What does not vary is the amount of compiling, sifting through the data, looking for the top patterns, whether by trainer or by race-type. It’s an interesting approach to handicapping, and for the six weeks or so of these meets, we endeavour to see it through. A little of what you fancy, as those swishy British people might put it.

For an informative and humorous explanation of how it works, here you go. Remember, you can save half by emailing us to take our survey and we’ll send instructions to save half off the 2013 Winning Trainer Tricks for Swampatoga & Del Mar.

SpaMar 2013: Half-Off!

Paying retail is for…for somebody else! Email us to take our survey and we’ll send instructions to save half off the 2013 Winning Trainer Tricks for Swampatoga & Del Mar.

SpaMar 2013: For the Bashful, the Unimpressed, the Stubborn, the Proud & Those Who Are Otherwise Too Good to Join Us

All right, all right. If we can’t complete any sort of transaction now (All-In-One, Winning Traininer Tricks), we shall at least make frenemies with yourself, OK? Free stuff daily includes Pick of the Day and the criminally insane HiddenEntries Weblog.

Best wishes!


Cynthia Publishing, 11054 Ventura Boulevard, Suite 377 / Studio City CA 91604
Voice (323) 876-7325 / Fax (323) 874-1591
info@cynthiapublishing.com


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