First Post: Friday, January 20, 2017

All right, all right, ya Real ’murrikans! Take it easy! Your boy is in office now, and he is a REAL ’MURRIKAN, not one of these illegitimate Muslims or Kenyans or Hawaiians. No, sir. This is a Real ’murrikan, righ’chere. Yep.

On the other hoof, his wife, Melania (which in all Indo-European languages translates to ‘black’!) is not a Real ’murrikan, though at least she is the proper pigmentation (most certainly not black) and from Europe (most certainly not any pygmy continent like Africa or Asia). U-S-A! U-S-A!

Also, here’s a famous saying from today’s festivities. We may yet live to see if it holds up:

Isn’t this also one of ’em so-called bubbles?

Free ones: Rundown…

Aqueduct 9
Gulfstream Park Proper 10
Santa Anita 8

Yesterday’s Activity:

Track (Win Mutuels $20+/Gettable)

Chas. Town (1/0) — JCPSD customers voice enmity for sewer project.

Delta (1/0) — DeRidder residents create petition for better internet.

Fair Grounds (0/0) — Uptown residents puzzled over mysterious ‘booms’.

Gulf (0/0) — Host Heat beat Dallas, 99-95; Miami’s Goran Dragic led all scorers with 32 pts.

Oaklawn (1/0) — Lonoke Co. man comes face-to-face with intruder, parolee.

PennNat (1/1) — The finale was contentious, but only High-Octane Chancers and Progressive-Minded Eggheads could light-up Gypsy Fire, a fine 90 on the LifeLiner Speed Column analysis; she was never far back, winning by 3 parts of a length at $23.80. Good work.

Turfway (2/1) — Well, Friends of Racing, the last ‘Yesterday’s Activity’ longshot of The Oblahblah Administration came in Race 6, not contentious. In it, only High-Octane Chancers and Progressive (!)-Minded Eggheads could aim high with Pierce the Sky, a commendable 88 (!) (White Supremacy #88 always!) on the LifeLiner Spread Column analysis; he went gate-to-wire to win by 1¾ at $109.80 — sorry, Don Trump Sr. fans, Oblahblah-haters and other assorted White Nationalists and devotees of whitebarf.com and stormdrain.alt…not a typo! Thus endeth The Oblahblah Administration, fittingly, with a triple-digit win mutuel. Thank you, Barrie Soetoro. We bet we won’t see your kind of taste and decorum around 1600 Penna. Ave. anytime over the next four to eight years. Thank you for this last triple-digit win mutuel, Barrie Soetoro. You give all people-of-color hope. Thank you. We hope you don’t waste your time in the Rust Belt or the Bible Belt — the people in those parts know everything, so let them fail to see they are really just living proof of The Dunning-Kruger Effect. Some people, they simply do not know their proper role. Thank you, Barrie Soetoro. You made it much safer to be a person-of-color in this country. Thank you. Barrie Soetoro.

Thank you. Best wishes. Goodbye. Hail!