First Post: Saturday, February 8, 2014

How ’bout that Liverpool F.C.! You’ll never walk alone! The Mersey Beat! The Arse suffer a horrendous larrupin’! A true larrupin’! A hiding! A larrupin’! Larrupin’!

Every year, the Arse F.C. is the cheap speed of the English Premier League. They make the running for half or two-thirds of the course and then start backing up. It’s like those $5,000-claimersz you see on the East Coast in two-turn route races, going in reverse around the far turn, like someone switched directions on the conveyor belt. You don’t see too many of those kinds of stoppers out West here, but you East Coast guysz know what those bottom-level dirt-route claimers look like when they decide they’ve had enough well before the wire.

Such is life annually when you back (back!) the Arse F.C. Utterly shambolic!

Free ones: Rundown…

Aqueduct 5, 7, 10
Gulf 10, 11, 12
Santa Anita 5, 6, 7

Pay-side: Today…

Fair Grounds 1, 2, 3, 6, 7, 9, 10
Golden Gate 8
Sam Houston 9
Laurel 7, 9
Sunland 7, 8, 11
Tampa 7
Turfway 4, 5, 8
Turf Paradise 5, 6, 8

Today’s Stakes Pageantry: GP 10 & 11, SA 5 & 7 on the free page.

On the pay-side it’s Tam 7.

Seems too easy for #1 Triumph and Song in Hou 8, the Bucharest.

A chance for a mild upset in SA 8, the Grade II R.B. Lewis: #7 Chitu.

And one of ’em Triple Threat Horseys for yourself in Sun 10: #3 Cottagecupcake.

Yesterday’s Activity: Over at the Turf Paradise, Race 6, the only race touted from that place, three horseys get credit, including First Bonkersmate Big Fat Storm.

Big Fat Storm is fifth-choice on the conventional V6 Betting Line, no Fair Odds in a contentious race. But he’s good enough on the LifeLiner Speed Column, and at 12-1 on the morning line, Big Fat Storm looks like a good play ahead of the race.

He goes off at 9-1 and wins gate-to-wire, hanging on by a shrinking half-length. This matches up with his complete LifeLiner array of 99-99-85, and he pays $20.80 up top. Completing the exacta is the top-touted Tapits Wildcat, 10-1 on the morning line but bet way down to 3½-1. The exacta pays $131-even.

The third-place finisher, 5-1 on the morning line and thus not touted, somehow gets away at 12½-1 in real life. He’s OK on LifeLiner Speed Column, too, and the trizacta returns $723.60, for $1.

The fourth-place finisher also scores sufficiently on LifeLiner Speed Column, with the super-duper coming back at $3,093.60, also for $1.

WMF Report:

Early
Aqueduct 6f
Beulah 6f
Sam Houston 6f
Laurel 6f
Keystone 6f
Sunland 6f
Tampa 6f

Rally
Gulf 1m (T)

Nocturnal Submission: Sifting through the wreckage. Sifting through the wreckage of the Arse 2013-2014 campaign. One thing they are sure not to find: a world-class strike-force.

Thank you. Best wishes. Goodbye. Bye-bye.