First Post: Sunday, May 5, 2013

Never had a problem with Claude R. McGaughey 3d. True, we were not Easy Goer fansz (Allah bless you, Sunday Silence), but Mr. Shug couldn’t be held responsible. Dancing Spree in the 1989 Breeders’ Cup Sprint only solidified his bona fides with us. Ridden by Angel Cordero Jr. Remember him?!

But yesterday in Louisville, it was good to see McGaughey have a little public weeping. As you may have gathered by now, we tend to have a warmer feeling and better sense of humanity toward the mopesz when they engage in a moderate bit of public-weeping — not the Encyclopædia Dramatica sort of woe-is-me sissie weeping (see Federr, Australian Open loss to RAFA THE BULL NADAL; see any message on PAYS ADVERTISEMENTS garish monstrosity) — but the good ol’ tears-of-joy-and-relief-and-genuine-happiness weeping. See the difference? Good job, Shug McGaughey. Now you live forever. Wonder if Shug has posted 50,000 messages on PAYS ADVERTISEMENT. No? Maybe under a clever alias? It is a reputable board, right?

As for Orb, well, if you like faves in 19-hoss fields, more power to yourself. Sadly, no dice with the longshot runner-up, either. OK, OK, we hear the calls coming from the universe: “Get a brain, moransz!” Ah, well. Today is the first day of the rest of our handicapping lives. Or something like that. We’ll be here. Perhaps so will you. Either way, best wishesz!

Free ones: Today…

Belmont 5, 8, 10
Calder 7
BFHollyPark 7, 8

Cinco de mayo today in La-La Land. Hoo-boy. There’ll be even more drinking than usual since this observance doesn’t explicitly involve the Virgin of Guadalupe. Lupe! Unfortunately for the revelers, the forecast is quite the opposite of Mexico: only 61°F under gray skies and strong winds this morning in Studio City. Remember it was 92°F only 48 hours ago to kick off this wacky weekend! Salud!

Pay-side:

Woodbine 2, 4
Pimlico 5, 6
Arlington 4, 7, 9
Louisiana 4, 6, 7, 8, 9
Lone Star 7
Turf Paradise 8, 9

Today’s Stakes Pageantry: Uh-oh. Vaunted Triple Threat Horsey status accorded to #3 Lovely Syn in Belmont 3.

Also that way for #2 Uncaptured in Woodbine 8, the Wando.

Yesterday’s Activity: Good on the free page.

Bonkersmate I’m Stoked did a nice job in Belmont 3; only a jinxed paceline (paceline!) prevented him from being a vaunted Triple Threat Horsey. Yea, verily, he topped the Pace Graph (“farthest-out ‘X’ ”) and the LifeLiner Speed Column analysis (the unbeatable “99”!). Yup, the single-paceline fantasy doomed him in this race. Yet he was one of the ones, despite the absence of Fair Odds on the Betting Line, and the public paid attention, knocking him down to 6-1 from 8-1 on the morning line. The win mutuel was $14.60.

Later at Elmont, the New Yorkers let one get away in the eighth. The horsey named Front got top billing. Somehow, this was an error. We really didn’t have any use for him. Honest. The transcriptionist made an error to everyone’s mutuel benefit. This is highly embarrassing. Trying too hard! Unconscious competence! Savant! Oracle! So, yes, everybody got away with it…this time! Whew. Regretsz!

Fully honourable intentions in the finale at the ’Gate, and the first of a couple of King of the NetCapper Bulliesz scores. This one in Albany (the one in California, not the one in New York) involved First Bonkersmate Bag’s of Fun, 8-1 on the morning line and 9-1 at the off. Everyone had the talent to win this, and Bag’s of Fun was the sixth-choice in the wagering in the seven-horse field, at 9-1! Wild open, wild open. A $20.80 mutuel there. And exacta and trizacta were not hard to envision, $76 and $288, both for $2, respectively.

Struck early and then eerily silent at BFHollyPark, with Gnarly Dude, 8-1 on the morning line and 11-1 when the gates opened, surfing home at $24.40. The runner-up was OK on LifeLiner, and the exacta was almost $200 for $2.

Perdition at Louisville but salvation at Collinsville (Ill.)? Luck is where you find it, even if the NBC Television Network Cameras are far away from the scene. So it was with “Nocturnal Submission” submission Burgan Rules, 20-1 on the morning line but bearing the weight of the large wagers placed on him by all three “HiddenEntries”/“First Post”/“Nocturnal Submission” looniesz. Nonetheless, a winner at $27-even.

WMF Report:

Early
Chas. Town 4½f, 6½f
Exhibition 6½f
Keystone 6f
Prairie 6f
Turf Paradise @1m (!) T (!!) WMF 157 (!!!)

Nocturnal Submission: Night off…

Thank you. Best wishes. Looks OK for the weekly minor hit “Monday Boxing” tomorrow. If not, then certainly two days from now for “Tuesday Sniping”. Until either such time, it’s goodbye. Adios, ya cinco de mayo loversz!