First Post: Sunday, January 1, 2012

Allah bless you, Syfy Channel! While the One-Eyed Pug clamors belligerently for another jeroboam of Veuve Clicquot Yellow Label around 2 a.m. PST, an hour when most sane and sober canines are paying tribute to Hypnos and Morpheus, you provide us pictures of the beautiful and talented (and dark-haired) Spence School alumna Elizabeth Montgomery prancing around in a miniskirt and boots. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Other top episodes are “A Most Unusual Camera” and “The Last Night of a Jockey”, starring an angry and one-and-only Mr. Joseph Yule Jr.

And this extra for experts: If intemperate humans need to ingest the hair of the dog to get through the next morning, do drunk dogs have to bite the hair of the human? Just wondering.

Free ones:

Aqueduct 1, 3, 5
Gulfstream 1, 4, 5, 6, 8, 9
Santa Anita 2, 6, 7, 9

Our fondest hope that we ring-in 2012 the same way we bid farewell to 2011. These opportunities should deliver every possible chance of that.

Pay-side: For your looming holiday racing week. Today…

Turfway 1, 4, 9
Fair Grounds 5, 8, 9, 10
Turf Paradise 2, 6, 8
Sunland 8, 9, 10
Golden Gate 6, 8, 9

Nice everywhere, and give it up for Sunland and the ’Gate; they get into the act too!

WMF Report:

Speed
Gulf 6f
Los Al (zOMG!) 4½f
Sunland 6f
Turf Paradise 5½f, 6f

Nocturnal Submission: Night off.

Thank you. Best wishes. Happy New Year, and kindly join us again tomorrow for a special Monday edition of “First Post”, plus another rollout of your favourite feature, “Monday Boxing”. Until such time, and for the first time in 2012, it’s goodbye. Bye-bye.