Phillie Mummersz firing up Broad Street — and it’s not even Jan. 1! Put down that turkey leg and sing along! Everybody, Happy Thanksgiving, unless you are a Native American, in which case we weep a Trail of Tears for you on your annual Day of Mourning.
Free ones: Rundown…
Aqueduct 2, 7
BetFail 5, 6, 7, 8
Churchill 1, 5, 6, 10, 11, 12
Fair Grounds 8, 10
Golden Gate 2, 7, 8
Laurel 4, 6, 8, 9
Today’s Stakes Pageantry: CD 11 on the pay-side.
Live third-choice on your morning line in BetFail 4, the final running of the Grade III Vernon O. Underwood in Inglewood: #5 Chosen Miracle.
Yesterday’s Activity: As always, Welcome to The Home of The Runner-Up Finish, this time led by Fairbanks Kiss in Laurel 3. True, she was 8 lengths a loser, but she accomplished it at 37½-1.
Not quite as glamorous on the toteboard there, was the great Cherokee Artist, 7½-1, who took the Race 8 field to lunch — and promptly ate their lunch. Tied for lowest Fair Odds on the Betting Line at 2½-1, Cherokee Artist was bet-down by 50¢ (fitty!) from his 8-1 morning line. Spoiling the touted all-(Native)-American exacta — 11-1 Bonkersmate Perilous Indian was beaten a quarter-length out of the place-spot — was a non-LifeLine-sanctioned interloper. How much guns, germs and steel can one people endure!
Later at Woodbine, Race 5, it took an embarrassing five horseys to ensnare your $29.70 winner and your $172 exactor. And it’s not even Thanksgiving in Canada today! However, we are thankful for your sharing your Daytime Running Lights with us Amurrikansz.
Nocturnal Submission: Get ready to hurl! No, not that way, not from overeating — that’s what Brioschi is for, silly! Rather, Punkin Chunkin 2013 airs tonight, as always on Thanksgiving evening. Upon viewing, you’ll wish you had a trebuchet from which to launch your favourite slow Thoroughbred. Punkin Chunkin 2013. Don’t miss it. Check your local listings.
Thank you. Best wishes. Goodbye. Eat safely.