First Post: Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Sorry, Aqueduct fansz. No can do.

We are unable to force upon the readership unappetizing horsies and races. Thus, no free ones from Jamaica Bay today.

You saw over the weekend what happens when a quality hippodrome gets thrown in the mix: yea, verily, at Woodbine, a zongo $30-plus winner and, for good measure, a crusher near-$250 Bonkers Exactor Box for our mutuel enjoyment. This simply will not happen at the NYRA oval right now. Bad problems.

Anyway, yesterday, when the quality Turf Paradise racetrack was involved for the paying customers, it was another nice time: in the eighth, a 4½-1 Bonkersmate winner, with the top selection completing another winning Bonkers Perfecta Box, this time for $76; then in the finale, a 3-1 straight-winner, completing a tasty $74 daily double.

Quality at Turf Paradise, then. Quality at Woodbine, then. Desolation and something approaching The Repetition & The Sameness of The State at The Aqueduct now. Geo. Orwell would have put it much more literarily.

In the meantime, Patriot U.S. Representative Ms. Michelle Bachmann has been kind enough to deliver this prepared statement, and we won’t have to figure out what she’s looking at off camera.

“My fellow Amurricans, choose freedom! Choose democracy! Choose a way of life in which the outcomes are not preordained under a planned pari-mutuel economy! Choose a way of wagering in which your two bucks (or more) actually counts! In short, my dear friends, choose anyone other than O — oops, wrong speech. Choose anything but Aqueduct! Thank you! God bless you, and God bless the United States of Amurrica!”

Pay-side:

Tampa 4, 6, 8
Hawthorne 1, 7, 8

WMF Report: OK. Still good on the lead at 6f at Hawthorne and Tampa. …

Bye-bye.