First Post: Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Wonder how Uncle Joe Vladoe feels about this. Also, how are his many admirers in ’merika dealing with it? At any rate, it’s a relief to know that Gazprom was not monetarily influencing consulted on this decision.

The Triumvirate (Don Sr., Uncle Vladoe, bin Salman) wants to divvy up the World, just like in the days of the Roman Empire. We will stand idly by, stuffing our faces with refined-flour white (!) bread and amusing ourselves with penny-ante circuses on the NBC Television Network. Yup. Who’s left to root for — Chairman Xi? Or is it Marcus Zuckerstein or Jeff Bezos? Ugh. Apple, Google? Anyone? Maybe Thoreau & Emerson were on the right path. Watson/Siri 2020!

Also, remember when we hissed at the Eastern Bloc satellite nations for their obviously amped-up competitors in the Olympics? Now prolly half of ’merika is jumping up and down in protest, hoping that Uncle Vladoe & His Minions can muscle their way into the Games. The times, they are a-changin’!

Fleet Frontrunners
Delta 9
Mahoning 5
PennNat 8

Favorable Faves*
Delta 1, 5
Woodbine 2, 3

Freakazoid Factories
Gulf 9
PennNat 1
Turfway 7, 8

*-morning-line favorites only; denotes apprentice jockey — your mileage may vary
-raceday scratches unavailable at press-time; batteries not included

Also, how’s this for conspiracy: Pence put Don Sr. up to the Jerusalem thing, so as to accelerate the realization of the prophecies laid out in Revelation, the Meggido & Armageddon, that sort of thing. Because for Pence & His Religious Ilk, the End of the World Equals the Beginning of Heavenly Salvation. You’re right, though. That’s way too conspiratorial. Comet Ping-Pong & False-Flag Shootings are the only truth we need to know right now. Thank you for setting us straight!

About Shoutoute

The unofficial spokesperson for the Boys In The Backroom...
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